Modest Proposals
I told Dad I was going to fill my car with whiskey because it’s cheaper. He said they should put nipples on whiskey bottles and solve the baby formula crisis.
What’s in a Dot?
We wrapped a present with glittery paper, and now tiny blue dots sparkle throughout the kitchen. They resist cleaning. It’s a dot-by-dot project, so I’m on the verge of deciding it’d be a shame to get rid of them. They liven up the place. morrisstories.com
The View from Syndication
Why do I love “The Big Bang Theory?” It comes down to characters. It’s a sitcom, but the characters change and grow from season to season while remaining, essentially, themselves. The show was a ratings success, but I don’t think its writers get the credit they deserve for their artistry. morrisstories.com
What’s Out There?
Pentagon officials went before Congress this week to talk about UFOs. The official government name is unidentified aerial phenomena, but it’s the same thing: Stuff is happening that hasn’t been explained. Under questioning, officials said military sensors are picking up flying objects that turn and move too fast compared to U.S. technology or anything other …
Picking My Day
It’s Tuesday today, and I couldn’t be happier. It’s cliché to hate Mondays. Everybody hates Mondays. Cartoon cats hate Mondays. I like to think I’m original, my own man with my own thoughts. So let me just say, I love Tuesday.
Back and Older than Ever
The universe has served up a juicy nugget of comedy goodness from Canada. “The Kids in the Hall” is/are back some 30 years after the show ended. I highly recommend catching it on Amazon Prime unless you have an allergy to male frontal nudity. morrisstories.com
Talking it Out
Confession time: I talk to myself and consider it a bad habit. Then my friend said, “Talking to yourself is like throwing it on the screen so you can see it.” Maybe it’s a good habit? Either way, I wish myself had more interesting things to say. morrisstories.com
Missing the Lesson
Yesterday, I watched video of a beach house slipping into the swells of the Atlantic Ocean. There’s probably a lesson there, but I can’t think what it is because, dang it, I still want a beach house. morrisstories.com
Kid in DayGlo shorts climbs to the top
Sometimes during my daily walks, I encounter a kid who’s the same age I was when I was his age. He’s not happy with his DayGlo orange shorts. They’re the most comfortable pair he owns, he told me, but they’re easy for people to see. When he climbs a cedar tree in his front yard …
Life is a Fitted Sheet
I don’t think I’ve ever put a fitted sheet on a bed correctly the first time. I always, Always, ALWAYS have to put it on the wrong way and then move things around. That’s why I nominate the fitted sheet to be one of life’s many metaphors: You’ve got to do it wrong before you …